Stop this Liberal President!

 

Also published in my hometown newspaper, the Daily Hampshire Gazette.
 
My friends, like so many of you, I was appalled when our nation elected a liberal legislator from Illinois to the highest office in our land. I joined you in our chorus of protest because we knew that this usurper would never stop trying to tear our country apart from within. Now we all know that his reign of terror has, indeed, come to smite all of us who truly love our homeland and who wish to conserve all that is good and decent in our great nation. How voters reelected this liberal president during these days of national strife is one of the great mysteries of our time.

This liberal president attacks our sacred founding document, the Constitution, with an eye toward voiding its most fundamental precepts.

This liberal president uses dictatorial executive powers to grant amnesty to dark-skinned hoards of foreigners and set them loose to terrorize our native citizens.

This liberal president wages a terrible war against the most patriotic of our own citizens simply because he disagrees with our economic and religious views.

This liberal president burdens us with the nightmare of a federal income tax that stymies our country and attacks the very bedrock of our entrepreneurial freedoms.

This liberal president pours our national wealth into an educational system that he will use to indoctrinate our youth into his left-wing agenda of political, social, and philosophical beliefs.

This liberal president steals the role of private industry and grants government unprecedented power to control our lives by building controversial modern transportations systems.

This liberal president gives extraordinary free gifts to the least deserving occupants of our nation, letting them own the great properties of our land without paying for them--as God intended when He blessed the wealthy among us with material treasures to match their treasures in heaven.

This liberal president pays lip service to Christianity, while his true religious beliefs, if he actually has any, are as ambiguous as they are cloaked in his private life rather than displayed for all to see.

Yes, my patriotic friends, we must do whatever it takes to stop this liberal president from violating Article 1, Section 2, Paragraph 3 of our Constitution that values a Black person as three-fifths of a White person.

We must stop this liberal president from freeing the slaves out of their rightful place as the property of our plantation owners.

We must stop this liberal president from fighting the War or Northern Aggression (which some dare to call a "Civil War" between the states).

We must stop this liberal president from paying for his war by confiscating our wealth through the taxation of his demonic Revenue Act.

We must stop this liberal president from establishing a system of Land Grant universities to perpetuate his liberal ideas through access to higher education.

We must stop this liberal president from dragging us along the path toward a Socialist infrastructure by using the government to build a transcontinental railroad.

We must stop this liberal president from enacting his Homestead Act, an obvious welfare giveaway of forty acres and a mule to his political cronies.

We must stop this liberal president from mocking Christianity by saying such demeaning statements as this: "When I do good, I feel good. When I do bad, I feel bad. That's my religion." Any Muslim, Jew, Buddhist, Hindu, Sikh--or even atheist--could say as much.

Imagine our once great nation's future if we allow this liberal president to continue his attack on our founding traditions. Those who do not share our views could be insane enough to carve this liberal president's face into the side of a mountain, as outlandish as that may seem.

Worse yet, in a century and a half, we might even see the awful day when a mixed-race commoner, perhaps even another legislator from Illinois, a man with a foreign-sounding name and exotic birthplace, might be elected president as a slightly left-of-center moderate Democrat with plans to destroy the country by pursuing such horrible policies as immigration reform, a slight tax increase on the super rich, education funding, infrastructure improvements, a social safety net for the most vulnerable among us, and respect for the separation of Church and State.

That sickening vision should make all good Confederates tremble in our beds each night and stockpile weapons each day. We can only hope that true patriots like ourselves will fight that future president tooth-and-nail, just as we now wage our holy war against this current liberal president, the scoundrel Abraham Lincoln, at this crossroads of our nation's history, the Year of our Lord, One Thousand Eight Hundred Sixty Four.

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